Friday, May 3, 2013

A re-visit with our reproductive endocrinologist, as told by animated gifs.

I have been pondering for the past few days about how best to tell the tale of our re-visit with our reproductive endocrinologist last week and have settled on the time honored tradition of the animated .gif!

Let's kick this off by saying that the nursing staff at my RE's office does pretty much *everything* and here's what I think of them:

My RE himself is... good at what he does, but an incredible, self-important jerk for a face. We get 45 minutes with him once every 3 months. He does not deign to review our file before hand, instead he waits until we get into his office, then sits down and begins to waste our time by reviewing our labs quietly, on his computer, right in front of us, while we're all:

After taking about 10 minutes to look over our labs, he opened with "everything looks perfect, you should be pregnant. This is frustrating!"

At which point I'm thinking he's going for some sort of shock an awe tactic right off the bat. He then proceeds to give us his standard "I'm ok with you staying conservative and continuing IUI, but you could also move on to IVF" useless speech.

I interrupted him to tell him that as far as we were concerned our options were stopping treatment or IVF. He told us then that he didn't think that we should stop, which I suppose could be taken as encouraging. Not to worry though readers, he then went on to tell us about needing to have faith through gritted teeth, it was like watching a man possessed. I've never heard someone sound so sincere whilst violently avoiding rolling his eyes at his own statements. He started to talk about prayer groups at one point and I thought he was going to have a seizure. Then he said, and I quoth, "It's possible to want it too much"

By now, I've decided to stop engaging as I'm sure I've extracted everything useful this man has to say to us. My husband however wanted to hear about what our doctor thought about reproductive immunology, since we'd both been reading a lot about it and I have auto-immune diseases.

I wish I possessed the kind of comedic genius requisite to have made up what he then said to us. I shit you not kind readers, this man proceeded to tell us what he had in his burrito the night before.

You see, he'd been eating a lot of Moe's lately and was uncertain where the meat and vegetables in said burrito came from. As such, the pollutants we now consume could possibly be causing us to have more immune issues. But, blah, blah, blah, blah, he doesn't believe in reproductive immunology. I wanted to interrupt and suggest he try Chipotle instead.
Finally the meeting was over. I felt like I'd gained no insight into what to do next, and it took every piece of self restraint not to:

Once we got back to the car we decided to have a little debrief and it went something along the lines of:

We still need to do a lot of thinking about what to do next...


  1. So glad you decided to let us read your Blog of Obscurity. Your struggles are mighty, but your take is hilarious. *hug*

    1. oh dear god, my first comment!!! ::goes to find a paper bag to breathe into::

      Thanks!!!!!! \(^_^)/

  2. Hey Knoelle! This was ..perfect.. so funny and well written (LOVE the gifs).. and exactly how I feel .. I've been there, done that :)

    (auto immune issues, gazillion iuis, dreading ivf).


    1. Thanks for the comment (and compliments!) Nina. <3