decaf homemade almond milk ice coffee, you're not fooling *anyone*

And we have bizarre diet changes and caffeine withdrawal headaches folks!

...

The first person to tell me there's still caffeine in decaf will get virtually smacked upside the head.

My day in 10 easy steps!

Step 1 - wake up

Step 2 - sweat pants

Step 3 - make waffles

Step 4 - eat waffles with hands while pacing in kitchen

Step 5 - try RuPaul's Drag Race on Netflix

On Mother's Day

A lot of people in the infertility community dread today, put self imposed bans on Facebook and avoid locations where mother's day is likely to pop up and remind them that they are not a mother (brunch spots, card stores, places of worship, groceries, flower shops, restaurants, any place beyond the front door and lets just be honest it's probably best to stay in bed with the covers over your head quietly humming to yourself).

I didn't have any plans to do any such deprivation today, and while the few posts I've already seen on Facebook this morning did make my heart take that slight dip into my stomach - overall I'm not feeling this day is any different.

Maybe it's partly because I've finally gone numb to it all? I know for a fact it's not because I'm all zen and accepting about our situation (that's for fucks sure).

But the overwhelming feeling I am experiencing at the moment, and perhaps this is why today hasn't sent me into hysterics (yet!) is that I'm not a mom, and can't even aspire to be lumped in with today's celebrants.

That my major life goal right now is so unobtainable that I can't even look at those who have it and be jealous.

And *that* is some shit I need to work on.

The Extended Forecast

May - You know what they say! April cancelled-due-to-over-stimulation IUIs bring May self loathing and
binging! Expect periods of heavy drinking. Our satellites are showing a high likelihood of renewed ice coffee and frozen yogurt addiction.

Shake it off - HAPPY DOG

Guess what time it is folks?!

You got it - it's "still not pregnant o'clock"!

But this dog doesn't care, cause it is the happiest dog *in the world*

A re-visit with our reproductive endocrinologist, as told by animated gifs.

I have been pondering for the past few days about how best to tell the tale of our re-visit with our reproductive endocrinologist last week and have settled on the time honored tradition of the animated .gif!